Your Power over Memories by Grace Dannemiller
Peaceful day in my life at school!
Hey, it’s Grace. Today, I want to talk about one of the most important parts of my sense of self, power over my thoughts.
People have always told me to "move on from the past" so I can live in the present, but I never really understood when or how to do that. I spent years in therapy, and one day, I realized that the things that once felt so big to me now felt small. And bringing them like they were still major
parts of my life no longer felt right or comforting. That’s when iI realized I had fully processed those memories, and I was finally ready to let them go.
It had never occurred to me that I was allowed to forget or change my automatic thoughts. I didn’t have to let certain memories take up space in my mind. There is so much power in choice and autonomy. Choosing what I allow to occupy my thoughts has given me so much peace and freedom.
That said, it’s important to be honest with yourself. Are you truly letting go of a memory you’ve processed, or are you just shoving it down, ignored? In the past, I thought I was moving on, but really, I was just ignoring my problems.
Now, when I start to feel claustrophobic in my head, I take a memory, whether it’s something small, like an awkward social interaction, or something bigger that no longer serves me, and I make the conscious choice to let it go. If it ever pops up in my automatic thoughts again, I simply say no and shift my focus elsewhere.
Emotions and automatic negative thoughts can feel so strong, but you are stronger and more powerful and you really do have so much control when you practice how to use it. I think of it as setting a boundary with myself or with my brain. And practicing setting that boundary with yourself will help you build up the confidence to set them with others in your life.
Additional tools for when you may be in crisis:
U.S. Crisis Text Line: 741-741
Ohio Mobile Response and Stabilization Services: 1-888-418-MRSS (6777)